The journey through the vast spaces of The Mind and memories....
I saw I got on a Giant Wheel,tall like i'd touch the sky.I climbed
onto it with two men by my side,two gentlemen.The wheel started rolling and my
tummy started churning.I even fell on the cabin floor as the heel of my
stiletto found its way through the gaps between the iron bars.I sat down
instead for it wasn't so bad sitting and the men beside me,they sat too so I
wouldn't feel alone. It sent a shiver down my spine,seeing the
world rolling,the sky suddenly seemed so close and as quickly so far
away.Peeping up through the giant iron structure of the wheel,for a moment,i
felt like a prisoner behind bars yet,I was calm like the endless ocean that
knew no worries for I was with the men beside me and I knew one of them well,so
well,I'd consider him my Life!The other gentleman however,I knew him not,not
the slightest.To me,he was a Stranger-with-no-Name,even he didn't feel the need
to introduce himself and now,I don't even remember his face.I guessed he was
just a friend who simply tagged along and if he was a friend of the man I
knew,I was sure he'd have been discreetly chosen.I was with the man I knew,I
had nothing to worry,not the constant roaring of the Giant Wheel,not the
screeching of its rusty hinges,not of the sky,not of the fall,not of the Topsy-Turvy
world.I had nothing to fear for he'd give his life for me.I felt good,I felt
proud and I got time to look around and below only because it took an extra
long round before halting.I thought it was too long a round,that it wasn't even
right,to have promised for one round and take two before getting on that plane
to Some place Far Away.The Giant Wheel,it was no fun ride,it was the passage to
the Giant Steel Bird,somehow was its aerobridge !
Victorious,I got
to the foot of the ladder to the plane,it was white and blue,the paint,very
faint blue but illuminating.We hopped in hastily like they'd leave without
us.Three of us,we took our seats,I sat in the middle.There were people
around,passengers looking out for their seats,it took time to finally settle
then we were ready for take off.I couldn't see the faces,there were three girls
with their backs facing us,sitting in front of the control panel(it wasn't the
cockpit),switching switches up and down.The middle one then took up the
microphone that lay before her,was more than happy to make the announcement
that the plane would reach some place(the name was hard to remember)in 1 hr
time and that she would keep updating about the coming places we'd be flying
over which;not that the plane would land for a break,it was just so to know.She
wasn't our pilot,truthfully,I was quite relieved.I felt she lacked
something,maybe seriousness that gave in her confidence.She was giggling way
too much to look professional.
Another part of the announcement contained information about call
rates and talk time and that we could recharge anytime with "air-time"
they said.I had no clue as to what that was.I was even asking because I'd hate
to pretend if someone asked me but I was quickly silenced,by a witty man from
the front row,who happened to turn back to and to even mock at the thought that
there even lived a person who knew not what air-time was.I was thinking of it
to be some kind of recharge sent to the handset through a hand gesture,or even
through a whisper for that matter;anything could be possible in a plane I could
board from a Giant Wheel!!
The
witty man was the age of around 65,a foreigner to me but origin,I cannot say.I
must admit,I am very bad at it.German,even looked like a witty old
English,dressed a perfect gentleman in a crisp suit and a hat,a set of dark
grey.The foreign gentleman had actually turned back to ask me for a piece of
paper to jot down the details of the announcement.He
asked me to pass over to him what I had written because his feeble old hands
couldn't keep pace."i needn't write" i said,had to prove it to him
though so,i narrated from the start.He was finally impressed (old man was hard
to impress without hysteria!) and imitated my action with approving eyes and
again a witty smile.He did it just the way I had,with the index finger of the
right hand pointing to the temple (supposedly the spot of intelligence),
"ahh.. U have it all in your mind.!" then a gesture giving away a
salute in appreciation;humbly accepted by a nod.
I
looked down and on the foldable tray/table was my four lined copy with two
lines,top and bottom, of red and two middle ones of blue.I know you know
exactly what I am talking about.The hand-writing exercise copy we used in
school throughout our primary section as to set a good hand-writing that
would,as a grown-up,define you,your character,your impression,only if i'd
realize then how important it was (it just seemed trouble back then) perhaps,I
would be writing right now in the most beautiful Cursive with a fine fountain
tip but alas,m typing! When I took up my pen to really start jotting
whatever more was due to be announced,there were no more announcements.
Up and away! Finally we were in air.A glance outside the window,I
could see nothing.Only cloud they must have been perhaps maybe,we were actually
in it,making way,searing and roughing through its belly but the forgiving
generous cloud,I am sure it didn't mind.
I looked with love
at the gentleman beside me and I got back the same love,the same warmth in his
eyes.He finally talked.I hadn't quite noticed it seems.He was silent all the
while,from the time we met and got on together on the Giant wheel and through
the announcement and the encounter with the two foreign gentlemen;except a few
exchanged looks,he hadn't uttered a word!I never realised,it didn't even matter
much.His presence was more than enough for me.
He had come to
take me somewhere,someplace far off and i was going,without even a second
thought,not of people,not of the world,not of hope or desire,not of love or
despair,not even of my faithful dogs!
So he finally
spoke,spoke of a Stallion,mighty and strong,of a Stallion he dearly loved and
was greatly proud of.I could see in his eyes,his overwhelmed eyes full of
tears,the love he had for this Stallion,His Stallion!
He tilted his head
a little,looked right over my shoulder,a little above my head with the softest
of eyes I have ever seen,wet with sparkling tears.He managed a crying smile,his
cheeks reddened,perhaps,it was the look of ecstasy and I knew it was all for
his Stallion.He loved his Stallion dearly yet,could never be with him,to guide
him,to support him and to care for him but,he knew he was always there for
him,in his dreams,in the sky,in the wind,always around, and that thought of
togetherness forced a smile on his crying eyes.
The look on his
face,the emotions he could neither express nor repress,gave me an overwhelming
feeling,of love,of joy I had forgotten long ago.
The love that we
gave and now have carefully locked was returned ten folds,the moments we missed
of togetherness was missed a thousand times more.They could see us when we
couldn't and when they saw us happy,they were happier.Immense love has always
been and will always be around.He was happy his mighty Stallion had been doing
mighty things.Never a moment had he let him down.His pride always and will
forever be.He needn't worry about his Stallion.He mentioned he called him,
"My Stallion" often,the Stallion, my Brother.
It looked like a
Halo over his head,the radiance from behind brightened him up more.He was
glowing and finally,he came back from his travel down the memory lane,aware of
his surrounding now,in the plane,travelling to some distant foreign
land.Now he rests assured.
He turned his eyes
on me,I knew he loved me no less.He opened his arms,took me in,kissed the
warmest kiss on my cheek and told me we're going (must be home),to where people
were waiting for me,where I would always be happy with love all around me.I was
excited,I was thrilled,I couldn't wait to be home.
I looked out to
the sky through the square cabin windows,triumph and ecstasy filled my soul.I
wished I could fly.Out there in the vastness of the clouds in the sky,something
caught my eye,beauty redefined in the purest of places;a Beautiful garden,a
garden that would never end.Such beauty,such radiance that could be only felt
not touched,only seen not spoken of.I didnt care if it was even possible for I
was in the sky,on an aeroplane,the Steel Bird,it didn't matter.It was
beautiful,I'd rather believe I said to myself.A garden with the biggest green
leaves and planted on what,cloud?I didn't care.The loveliest of flowers it
bore,delicious,like I 'd eat them whole.Soft baby pastel pink on the tip and
cool lemon yellow towards the stalk.All flowers same,none more beautiful than
the other or maybe,such flowers could be planted only on clouds!
I couldn't achieve
bliss alone,I had to share it,I had to show him before it faded again.
He was looking at
me with tears of joy and sorrow when I suddenly screamed out loud .. "Appa
,hernu na chito kya dami flowers.!" ( "Dad,look such beautiful
flowers.!") ..
He turned around
to see the flowers.I was glad,very glad he too saw them but I, I couldn't see
Him after that.
And just when I
thought it was as real as me,I opened my eyes and realised he's gone..
It was only a
Dream ...
